This is really a wonderful site. One of the best things to happen in my life. I thank you all for your responses.
YIL, I didn't try AYP deep meditation. Right now this is what I am doing. I sit with my eyes closed and just be aware of my heart region. But I will try DM.
CarsonZi, I was reading about nauli kriya. It sounds very interesting for gastric problems but I was a bit confused about the process. I need to read it few more times to understand completely. I have one concern though. I was doing alternate nostril breathing, ujjai etc before but they aggravated my sysmptoms. But I will definitely give this a try.
anthony, these are my sysmptoms. I have chest tightness (sometimes with heart palpitations, high pulse rate, and high blood pressure), head pressure/headache, and anxiety. I have these symptoms 24/7/365. Another symptom is I abruptly wake up from my sleep after 5,6 hrs. This happens every night. After getting up I feel awful for a couple of hours. If I can rate the combined pain of all these sysmptoms at 5 out of 10, then after eating anything (not much difference between healthy food and junk food, sometimes hot and spicy food makes it worse and sometimes a fruit, vegetable, rice, or even a multi vitamin tablet will make it worse) the pain increases to 8 or 9, stays there for 1 or 2 hours and again will come back to 5. This has been the case for atleast 20 years. Doctors tested for acid reflux, gastirc motility disorders, heart problems, blood tests etc, but everything came negative. I was told by atleast two doctors that I had to live with this for the rest of my life.
thimus, very interesting response. I am not very familiar with Eckhart Tolle teachings but at some point in my life I was interested in Vipassana mindfulness, just present moment awareness without judgement. But I could not continue because of two issues.
One, I have sleep problems because of meditation. I posted another question on this site
http://www.aypsite.com/plus-forum/index.php?topic=5162If I meditate in the evening, I won't be able to sleep in the night. Now mindfulness is also a form of meditation, so I am concerned about doing it the whole day. Being aware of myself (or my pain) without judgement throughout the day can be intense on my nervous system.
Second thing is, may be pain is considered as a gift by some highly developed persons. When I was in my teens, I was so excited about spiritual path. Slowly I woke up to the fact that this condition was moving me away from spiritual practices. If I do asanas or pranayama, I suffer from aggravated symptoms for 1 or 2 days. This state also had impact on how much I enjoyed with my parents, my education, job, financial condition, relationship with my friends/relatives, and now even on my kids. Every event in my life entered and is leaving or left me without any sweet memories. Every time I sit before food I know that my symptoms are going to aggravate. How much pain is enough pain? Didn't Jiddu Krishnamurthy take pain killers during cancer treatment? Sometimes I feel very confused and lost in life. Maintaining awareness requires energy. Energy requires motivation. I just could not motivate myself.
