last night, I felt very lonely, so I invoked Him.I am drawn to Lord Shiva.So He came, as we picture Him, wearing a cloth around his waist.Later on we were naked but He was far from me
I asked him: why are you so far? Dont leave me
He replied: I dont need to touch you.You can feel me from afar
i was able to feel him sexually
then tears started to run down my cheeks
He was surprised.He said: you can feel me so why the tears?
I found myself saying in an agitated way: I love You...I love You...God I love You..dont leave me
Then I noticed a picture of my Teacher hanging in front of my bed.He was a monk, his eyes were closed, peacefully meditating
Shiva was still in the background
I said: Swamiji I love You..I love You...God I love you..dont leave me
Then my tears stopped,my eyes fixed on the monk picture...and a deep silence came in ...