Hi Lili:
My dad passed away in 1987 from ALS.
Also known as Lou Gehrig's disease (after the famous baseball player who had it, resulting in it receiving worldwide attention in the 1940s), ALS is a neurological degeneration originating in the brain and spinal cord that debilitates muscular functioning, leading to paralysis and death, usually within a few years after diagnosis. In a rare case, a person with ALS may live a long time in a paralyzed condition. The famous British physicist, Stephen Hawking, is an example.
In our case, my dad lived for only 6 months after diagnosis (though signs were there for years before), and during that end stage his crusty/hard exterior gave way to a divine illumination coming from within. Of course, being around a terminally ill person will not be seen in this way by everyone. It depends on the perception of each person affected. In the case of my dad and me, there was an awakening, before and after his death, and I have treasured the experience with gratitude ever since. For the rest of the family, and the medical people involved, it was a failure of life. It was that for sure, but there was so much more going on.
I mention all this, Lili, because there is no cure for ALS, and you are likely dealing with a terminal situation with your friend, and that may bring up the spiritual considerations mentioned, depending on the people involved.
Then again, he may be a rare case like Dr. Hawking, and then life will become a long series of strategies for survival and communication. ALS takes away speech, along with nearly everything else. But the mind usually remains intact.
There are no easy answers on this one ... it is the cycle of life, up close and personal.
The guru is in you.
