I need 3 lbs. of enlightenment, 2 liters of pure bliss consciousness, and a half-gallon of cosmic ecstasy--pronto! Where's the cashier in this joint?! I've got cash and I'm ready to spend it. What's a man gotta do to get some service here?! Has the whole world gone crazy!? I remember the good ol' days when a man could whip out his wallet and walk away with full-blown ecstatic bliss like it was nothing...just like taking a walk in the park. Now a man's gotta engage in multi-channeled spiritual practices just to get a taste of that sweet, transcendent candy. Hard times, I tell you, hard times.